Final Count

We have 5!! The clinic called today to say 3 more were able to be biopsied so we have a total of 5 that are now frozen.  Here comes another two week wait…for results that is. Fingers crossed that we have at least one that we can transfer in February!

Day 5 update

We still have 8 in the game!!! 

2 were biopsied today and frozen 

5 are close to being able to be biopsied – hopefully tomorrow!

1 is a little behind but still growing 

Our RE said the 2 are perfect and beautiful and she is thrilled with how things are going.

We will get another update with the final count.

After how things went last cycle I know we are so far from being out of the woods but I am feeling hopeful – at least for today! 

Day 2 update 

We still have 8!!! 7 are 4 cell and 1 is a 5 cell and our RE said they are beautiful! 

Our clinic doesn’t check them on day 3 or 4 so our next update will be on day 5 which is Sunday. At that point it will be decided if we can biopsy them or if we will need to opt for a fresh transfer.

 Our last fresh cycle I was hospitalized for OHSS so we had to freeze our one blast which did turn out to be a BFP when we did our first FET but we miscarried at 8 weeks and pathology showed our little girl had two trisomys. It has been such a heartbreaking experience that the thought of transferring again without PGS testing scares me to death – hopefully Sunday will not present us with that very difficult decision.

Fertilization report

14 eggs retrieved 

12 eggs mature

8 fertilized normally

Last cycle we had the same number of mature eggs but only 4 fertilized normally – perhaps using fresh sperm this time (last time we used frozen from my husbands previous PESA) did the trick! 

Fingers crossed that the update tomorrow will be a good one! 

Starting stims tonight

So last Friday I had another appointment. Bloodwork and sono looked good so we were given the green light to begin microdose Lupron. Last cycle I did regular Lupron and the shots were a breeze. This time not so much. I have no idea what they use to dilute the Lupron but it’s terrible. The pain is delayed but then feels like a razor blade cutting over and over. Each time hubby gives me the shot it brings me to tears. Tonight we add in the Gonal F and Menopur which I remember for last cycle wasn’t fun either. My next monitoring appointment is Friday – hopefully things will start off strong! 

Let’s make a baby take two…or IVF cycle 2 begins

Until it doesn’t. 

I had my Lupron evaluation today to make sure the birth control pills had made everything calm enough to start another cycle. It was my first sono since my miscarriage (more on that in another post) and as I got up on the table I couldn’t help but think back to those previous appointments. First the joy of seeing that tiny flutter and then the devastation of being told it was only time until it would stop. 

In some ways this appointment felt much like when we began our first cycle back in July. Last cycle we were part of the shared risk program that our clinic offers but because I turned 39 the day after my D&C we were told after our WTF appointment that were were being kicked out of the shared risk program. Happy Fing Birthday to me. Because of this we had to pick another package and redo all of our paperwork and since we are now adding PSG testing we had those consents as well. 

I was instructed to pick up my compounded Microdose Lupron today since my shots were supposed to begin on Friday morning. That was until my nurse called at 4pm to tell me my estrogen is too high (86) and it needs to be under 50 to begin. So two more days of pills and then I get to go back for another date with the dildo cam and a blood draw. 

This really isn’t feeling like much of a Happy Thanksgiving.

And the blood test says…it’s over

The nurse called with my blood results from this morning. “Your beta was 5 so we consider that not pregnant – you don’t need to come for any more betas.” And with that call came the end of what has been the most emotional and heartbreaking 2 months of our life. Each day that passes brings new challenges but also gets a little easier. The tears still come easily, sometimes at the most unexpected times but they are less frequent. So now we move forward. We try again. Knowing more this time than last. Realizing that IVF is really a house of cards, one misstep and the it all comes crashing down.